Sure, you say you love the great outdoors. You think you can handle a bit of snow. But have you ever been chased down the street by an angry Canada Goose just for existing? Have you ever been late to school because a moose refused to move off your driveway? Have you ever tried to explain to someone that yes, we say “sorry” a lot, but no, it does not mean we’re actually sorry?

Being Canadian isn’t just about maple syrup and politeness—it’s about survival. It’s about knowing that the real apex predator of the north isn’t a bear—it’s a goose that feels mildly disrespected. It’s about understanding that a moose will always have the right of way, and that the simple act of walking home can turn into an extreme sport.

If you’ve faced these trials and lived to tell the tale, congratulations—you’ve earned the right to rock Duck Duck Moose, Duck Duck Goose, and Duck Duck Canuck. And if you haven’t? Well… good luck.